How You Can Date Smarter (Not Harder)

How You Can Date Smarter (Not Harder)

Now is a great time to embrace online dating. It is more popular than ever before (partially due to the current pandemic), with millions of singles matching every day – but if you actually want to increase your match rate, you should date smarter (instead of harder).

Here are four tips to help you improve your online dating game.

 

1. How To Date Smarter: Be Aware Of Your Own Blind Spots

It doesn’t matter if you’ve been online dating for years or days; either way, it is always beneficial to be aware of your own blind spots. It can be difficult to do a truly honest self-evaluation, but this will help you to identify any behaviors that could be stopping you from meeting the right person.

After all, many people accidentally self-sabotage when they are dating. From jealousy to fearing commitment, there are lots of common behaviors that make it hard to find love. Some behaviors are also less obvious; for instance, maybe you always prioritize your date’s feelings over your own, and over time this could result in an unfair relationship where your feelings aren’t considered.

 

2. Go For Quality, Not Quantity

This phrase is well known for a reason. Sure, you may feel proactive swiping for hours, or sending the same ‘hello!’ message to all your matches, but this doesn’t necessarily increase your odds of finding someone. In fact, it is more likely to give you dating fatigue!

So instead of casting a wide net, focus on quality over quantity. Be picky with your matches, and really make an effort to hold an interesting conversation (rather than expecting the other person to make all of the effort).

 

3. Make An Effort To Be Specific

You should also spend some time curating your dating profile. Lots of people just upload one picture and a one sentence bio, but this will reduce the number of matches you get. Instead add at least two pictures and provide a few interesting details; talk about your interests and hobbies, and be clear about what you want. For instance, if you want a serious relationship rather than a casual one, say that! This means you are more likely to match with people who are on the same page as you.

 

4. Don’t Forget About IRL

Finally don’t forget about real life dating. The pandemic has made it very hard to meet people organically, but now parts of the world are slowly reopening, so this could be a dating option for you in the future. If this does happen in your city, consider dedicating a little time and energy to both online and IRL dating. Take classes that sound interesting to you, visit bookstores and coffee shops alone, and consider joining meet up groups that give you the chance to meet other people who live in your area.

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Amy Johnson
Written by Amy Johnson