You’ve met someone amazing. They make you laugh, and you’ve had a few really fun dates. You’re not in a relationship, but you want to see them again. How should you play it?
It can be tough to get the balance right when you are dating someone new. You don’t want to seem too forward and clingy, but you also don’t want to push them away by seeming distant and cold. If you can relate to this, here are 6 tips to help you play it cool when you start dating someone new.
1. Don’t talk about other men/women to provoke a reaction
Sometimes people mention other interested men and women to make it seem like they are in high demand with the opposite sex.
However, this is more likely to put your date off than charm them! No-one wants to fight for someone’s attention, and this move makes it seem like you are more interested in playing the field than starting a relationship.
2. Reply to their messages (even if it isn’t right away)
A popular dating rule is that you should always wait a day to text back – but this is one of the worst dating rules in existence!
If someone texts you and you don’t reply, it will just seem like you are ignoring them and they will stop texting you. Remember that it only takes a few seconds to see that you have a message, and it only takes a few minutes to reply!
Don’t worry – you don’t have to drop everything to reply to a text. You have other priorities like work and family! Instead reply to the message when you have a few free minutes. This way you don’t seem overly keen or distant – and you’re not playing a game, you are just being genuine.
3. Don’t be pushy with social media
If you have gone on one date with someone, avoid instantly friending them on Facebook and Twitter. It can seem a little pushy and presumptuous, and it may result in an awkward de-friending if you don’t meet up again. Instead wait until you have gone on a few dates, so that it feels more natural.
4. Don’t dwell on the past
Often people carry baggage from past relationships into new ones, and this often ruins the relationship. Don’t expect your date to make the same mistakes as your ex – your date is a different person, and it is unreasonable to link the two people together in your mind.
5. Don’t try to rush into a relationship
When things are going well, people are often tempted to push things forward to create security. It is totally normal to discuss you and your date’s feelings, but remember there is happiness in taking things slowly and enjoying every moment for what it is. If it is going to become a relationship, it will – and trying to force it may put your date off the idea.
6. Be yourself
The easiest way to play it cool is to just be yourself. Playing games and putting on an act can become stressful, and it isn’t an honest representation of you in a relationship. Let your personality shine through and then your date can actually get to know you for you!