The internet has transformed the world of dating. In some ways this is a good thing; online dating has made it possible for people to date people from all across the world, and it is perfect for shy people who dislike nightclubs and bars. However the internet isn’t always a good thing when it comes to online dating… especially when it comes to ghosting.
What is ghosting?
Ghosting refers to people who talk online for a while, before one person completely disappears. They don’t say why, or offer an apology – they just stop replying to your messages and you never hear from them again. This can be very upsetting, especially if you started to develop feelings for the other person.
Thankfully there are a few signs that indicate that someone is about to ghost you. It can be useful to learn these signs, especially if you are an avid online dater, as it means that you won’t waste your time talking to someone who is about to drop off the face of the earth.
Here are four signs that indicate someone is going to ghost you.
1. They Frequently Send One Word Messages
You send long messages to them with lots of information; you talk about your day, your friends and the things that made you laugh – but when they reply, they barely acknowledge what you have said. Sure, they do reply, and if you ask a question they answer… but their brief messages seem distracted and disinterested, and the lack of information makes it hard for you to keep the conversation going.
2. They Often Cancel On You
They often cancel on plans that you have made. Whether you planned a phone call or an actual date, they are very flaky and regularly cancel… even when they knew about the plan days beforehand. It can be tempting to dismiss this as them being busy, but if it is constantly happening it likely means that they are about to ghost you.
3. They Never Make Plans For The Future
You frequently suggest plans, from going out for a meal later in the week to taking a short vacation in the future. But every time you do, your crush is noncommittal; they say things like “sure, let’s see how the week goes”, even though you have given them enough notice to be able to commit to a date. This could mean that they like having someone to talk to, but they don’t actually want anything more – and if you keep pushing, they will stop replying to your messages.
4. They Aren’t Interested In Your Life
When you first started talking to your crush, they seemed really interested in your life. They asked about your career and your hobbies, and they seemed impressed by the answers – but now they rarely ask you about your life. And on the rare occasion that they do ask, they don’t seem very interested; they never ask follow up questions, and they never seem excited or happy for you.
It can be difficult to stop talking to someone you like, even if they are bad for you, but it is the best option for your mental health. And remember; once you stop focusing on someone who isn’t right for you, it will be easier for you to find someone who really appreciates you!