Dating in your 30s can be fairly different to dating in your 20s. After all, most people are looking for different things in their 30s – and past dating experiences can affect people in a lot of ways.
This isn’t to say that dating in your 30s isn’t fun. In fact, lots of people really enjoy the experience of dating as a 30something! However, there are some realities that are difficult to avoid.
Here are four funny, relatable realities that often happen when you’re dating in your 30s.
4 Realities Of Dating In Your 30s
Conversations About Marriage And Children Come Up Quickly
When you are dating in your 20s the topic of marriage and babies rarely comes up. In fact, many people would (metaphorically) run away if someone in their 20s brought this topic up during the first few dates!
However it is fairly normal for singles in their 30s to discuss marriage and babies early on, especially if they know what they want. This makes it easier for people to find someone they are actually compatible with.
After all, if you know you want children it would be a bit of a waste of time to spend 6 months exclusively dating someone, only to find out they never want to have children!
Your Family May Try To Get Involved
While this isn’t the case for everyone, for some people their families do get more involved in their dating life when they are over 30. This is often due to outdated societal expectations; in the past, many adults were married by 30. Now people tend to get married later in life, and casual dating can happen for years or even decades.
So if you are getting comments from your family, remind yourself that your dating timeline only has to work for you. Don’t feel any pressure to settle down with the next person who comes along. Instead, wait for someone you truly have a meaningful connection with.
You Might Encounter Some Emotional Baggage
If you are dating in your 30s, there is definitely a chance you will encounter emotional baggage (whether it is yours or someone else’s). This is because lots of people have emotional baggage, especially after over a decade of dating. For example, you may match with someone who has gone through a divorce. This doesn’t have to be a problem, but it is important to make sure that you and your date are both individually working on any baggage that you have.
You Might Have More Confidence
Various studies have found that generally people in their 30s have more confidence than people in their 20s. This is for a variety of reasons; they know themselves well, and they also know what they want in life. This makes it easier for people to love themselves in their own skin.
This can make dating much more enjoyable, as it means you are more likely to date people who you will genuinely have fun with. It also means that you are less likely to waste your time dating a walking red flag!
You Have A Better Idea Of What You Want
People in their 30s tend to have a decent amount of dating experience, and this makes it easier for them to know what they want. They have experienced failed relationships, happy relationships and personal self reflection.
Now they have a much better idea about what they want. This could be someone who likes the same things as them, or it could be someone with similar values. Either way, they are far less likely to go on dead end dates with someone they are not compatible with!
Dating Is Still Fun
Dating is still a lot of fun in your 30s, even if there is some pressure to settle down. It is likely that you still have some single friends to spend time with, and you probably have more disposable income to spend on dates and meeting new people.
You Know Not To Waste Time On So-So Situations
One of the best things about dating in your 30s is knowing when to walk away from a situation. A decade ago you may have continued dating someone you weren’t compatible with, but now you have a better sense of your self worth and your values. It is likely you also have some set deal breakers when it comes to finding love!
You Don’t Compromise On Things That Are Important To You
It is likely you have enough experience in the dating world that you now have an even clearer idea about your wants, your relationship, your commitments.
What makes dating at 30 really good for most people is knowing how valuable they are. Sure, when you were 20 it was ok to date someone with someone who left mouldy plates on the floor and had a single pillow to share, but that isn’t the case now.
You Value Your Own Time More
Most people in their 30s values their own time more than they did in their 20s. They are more likely to have exit plans in place for bad dates, and they will end things quickly if they don’t see a connection.
This means that they don’t waste their (or their date’s) time, which can make dating much more efficient.
You May Still Feel The Timeline Pressure
One negative thing about dating in your 30s is societal pressure to settle down. This doesn’t affect everyone, but in your third decade of life you are more likely to feel pressure from family and friends to find love.
If you can relate to this, remember that life isn’t linear. Some people get married in their 20s and divorced in their 30s, while other people don’t meet their soulmate until they are much older. So try to take the pressure off yourself, and instead focus on the things in your life that do make you happy.
Stop Dating People For Their Potential
When you are in your 20s you might find yourself dating someone for their potential, rather than their reality. This can be a big waste of time, especially if the person is happy as they are.
In your 30s relationships tend to have a quick expiration date if they aren’t actually a good match. This makes it easier for you to avoid wasting time in a relationship with a person who isn’t actually marriage material.
What percentage of 30 year olds are single?
You may think that there aren’t many people your age that are single, but that isn’t the case. In fact, around 44% of adults in their 30s are single!
Start Finding Love Today
If you want to find love in your 30s, we are here to help. Our dating website Date British Guys has tens of thousands of members all across the world, and they are all looking for love. We also have more members in their 30s and 40s than in their 20s, so this is a great place for you to find love.